Today, I’ve cried more times than I can count.

I have a sick feeling at the pit of my stomach that I can’t shake today.

At times I am plagued with wonder and worry of what the future holds for our sweet eight week old foster son. He is so perfect, so innocent, and completely beautiful. I am the only mama that he has known, and I have done my best to protect and love him with every fiber of my being.

I get lost in the laughter, joys, busyness, and hardships of mothering my three children, most of the time forgetting that my youngest is a foster child. But there are moments and happenings in which I am rudely reminded that our beautiful boy could be removed from our home at any time.

Parenting is so hard.

Another element of difficulty is added to parenting when the child that you have invested so much in, and love so deeply could be gone in an instant. Foster parenting is the most painful and vulnerable position that I have ever been in.

On the other hand, foster parenting has made me feel like the luckiest woman alive! I have been blessed with two forever daughters who came to us through foster care. It has also given me the opportunity to mother this precious newborn boy for who knows how long, and I will treasure every second that I am given! Foster care is teaching me how to love selflessly, and without limits, even in the midst of fear of the unknown.

Foster care has forever changed my life.

Some days are harder than others, and today is a hard day. Today, I am reminded that I am not in control. So today I crawl to God, casting my burdens and anxieties upon Him, and trusting that He will continue to sustain me.

“Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you;
he will never permit the righteous to be moved.” Psalm 55:22

Consider joining me in fostering a child? Think about it! 🙂

xoxxox,

Leeanne

Photo By: Of His Fold Photography